Been- I had been…
Becoming- I am being…
Be- I will be…
Exactly, these 3 Bs actually speak aloud what we are. It’s often said that ‘we are what we eat’. That’s true when it comes to your physical health. But what about our mental health? Well, who are you to talk about mental health?
Are you a doctor? NO. A psychiatrist? NO. A scholar? NO, Not at all!
I am sure, am not any of those. But for sure, an observer of my own life and now a lot more of others.
We all had been through a lot. As we age, it’s not just our face and skin that start looking older. But there is this part that we go through, a lot of experiences. If our age came with maturity and if lies behind that maturity are a lot of good and bad experiences, well, I think you made it. I think it was all worth it, having this life.
I wish the world was a better place just to give us a ‘bed of roses’ every day. But, it really isn’t. The world was the best place to live, long ago, better a few decades ago, good a few more years ago, then it changed its face, slowly to bad, worse, and now the worst. Any change should happen within. You can’t change another person if you are not a better person to deal with the situation. You need to go through it first to know what the other person is going through. Experiences should be given a lot more emphasis in life than anything else. That’s why the name ‘fresher’ and ‘tenure’. The best example can be given to a fresh Cardiac Surgeon and a tenured one.
You had been going through failures. You failed in exams. You had a break-up. Your parents divorced. You had a bad childhood, nothing happened in your life, that you can be happy about. The college degree that you really wished to go for. You did not make it through, because of fewer marks. Your love of life, once, is now happily married and settled somewhere else, you were fired from your job. You were having huge financial issues. Last but not the least, you thought about or were constantly thinking about a ‘suicide’. If any one of these or all of these belongs to you, well, it’s time to figure out!
Let me tell you one tiny example. I had my schooling in a village school, though there was an English Medium division, our teachers used to read the textbook in English and explained it to us in our mother tongue. We friends, family, and neighbors, none of us bothered about the importance of learning to speak in English.
Our chit-chats were often, all happened in our mother tongue. Later, after college, I failed in many interviews, let alone failing, applying itself was a distant matter. I was having huge stage fear and was really embarrassed to speak a word, in front of the people from anywhere other than my native, those who spoke even wrong English. This is my ‘had been’.
It was easy for me to walk away from things that scared me, easy for a student to leave it behind. But as I became a woman, I started fighting with my inner self. I started to understand the need for coming out of my comfort zones, for good reasons. I started believing in myself more, than those things people see I lack, maybe I do, but I don’t want to be. This was my becoming phase of life.
My attitudes changed, my way of seeing my life changed, my way of handling situations changed. I am becoming someone whom I want to be. English was just a coincidence, to break the shell, and my previous office helped me in becoming me. I had to deal with a lot of unlike-minded people and circumstances every day. They shook me, they broke me sometimes. But I stood up, came so far in my life, stronger than ever.
Now comes the general part of ‘Be’. Our pasts would not be the same. Our presents would not be too. But our futures can be. How? In the way you perceive life. I would bet you, if life was a ‘bed of roses’, pleasing me in every possible way, treating me like a princess, everyone whom I met, giving me everything I need before I ask, If life was so fair to me, I would never ever have become what I am today.
People often curse the time, has it to have happened now? Why me? OMG, why this to me, over and over again? Well, just a simple answer. It’s nature’s way of moulding you to someone better. If you are born normal, you will die normally. If you go through a lot, you will surely die, but with endless experiences, you went through and amazing memories close to your heart. You had been through something, is the way to your becoming, for you to be a better ‘You’. If you lack these 3 Bs, then your life will not be complete. Hence, no matter, where do you stand in your life, embrace these 3 Bs with all your heart.
